Give Paisley a Heart Attack Day- Baby 68

Harry and Hermione grow up into beautiful young adults. While Hermione still has some rebellious tendencies and refuses to go to college, overall she has grown out of her terrible behavior and is moving on. I am a little bit afraid of some of the men she dates, though, to be quite honest. Harry has completely, one hundred percent quit his laziness and has decided to start a rescue shelter for animals while going to school to become a vet. I was very proud of both of them, even if I wished that Hermione would accept my offer to pay for her education.

Cho and Ginny age up wonderfully as well. Cho is extremely reserved and spends almost all of her time at the library, probably to be as far away from me as possible. Although I love the girl, we never had a chance to get close, so I really don't know as much about her as I'd like. Ginny, on the other hand, has broken away from me and has a ton of friends, no longer attached to my hip anymore. While I miss her by my side sometimes, I'm glad that she's branched out and she even has a boyfriend, although that was to be expected, considering how cute she is. 

Sirius and Minerva end up being my adorable little babies. Minerva has beautiful blonde hair that naturally curls, attracting all the boys to our house. She has a passion for horses and wants to someday own a ranch with her very own ponies. Sirius, on the other hand, has a strange obsession with cats. I think he'd fit in quite nicely with Calista Smith, quite honestly. Maybe I should ship him off to her house to give him the experience of a lifetime, huh? 

Even though I aged them up right after they were born, Ron and Fleur need an introduction, too! They both got their father's unique looks, Fleur getting his pink skin tone and my yellow eyes, while Ron got pretty much my everything. The two of them are always bickering and can't stand to be in each other's presence, which is quite sad and difficult to handle, but I somehow manage. Fleur follows Minerva around all day after school's out. I can tell that she wants to be like her older sister. 

As for Albus, he pops into toddler hood with a bang. He has the most precious face and beautiful skin, hair and eyes. Whoever his parents were, they must've been beautiful because that little boy is simply perfection. Even though he's not my biological child, it truly doesn't matter. I love him just as much as any of my other kids, and so far he can't tell he's different: he knows I'm his mother. He spends most of his time with Beans, so I can already tell that he's going to be a dog lover when he grows up. Well, I guess he already is a dog lover, technically. 

Last but certainly not least is Beans. He goes from an adorable little puppy to a full grown dog, guarding his family members with love and sleeping with me at night. He's quite beautiful, and I really love him with all my heart. I like to think of him as my fluffy child. 

 I lined up all of the newly aged up children (including Beans) in front of the house and then hugged Harry and Hermione goodbye, choking back tears. With only two teenagers to help out around the house with three toddlers and a rambunctious dog, I didn't know how I was going to make it through in one piece.

As I was putting the sopping clothing into the dryer, Minerva approached me with her puppy dog look plastered onto her face. "Mommy?" she squeaked, standing on her tip toes.

"Yes?" I replied, trying to sound as uninterested as possible, just to annoy her.

"So I was wondering..." She trailed off, probably hoping I would break and ask what she wanted.

I glanced at her quickly, urging her to continue.

"Do you think we could buy a horsey? I've always wanted one, and I know you do too. I heard you telling Aunt Skye about it the other day, about how you used to have a horse and how you're tempted to buy another one."

Damn it. She caught me red handed.

"Fine," I sighed. "I guess you've got me there. I'll call Skye and we can go tomorrow."

Minerva clapped her hands excitedly, giggling with joy. I called up Skye and asked her to accompany us the next day, and she gladly accepted.

After I was done with that phone call, Sirius came running up to me, a look of pure determination set on his face.

"And what do you want?"

"A cat. I think it's only fair if you're getting a horse for Minnie. Don't you think?"

I sighed. "Well... I guess you've gotta point there. Fine. One cat. One of each animal is my limit," I said, as sternly as I could. I was more of a kiss up kind of mom than anything else.

Sirius grinned. "That was easier than I thought. I had a huge speech written out, too."

I chuckled. It was actually pretty ridiculous how spoiled my children were. I just figured that they were only going to be with me for a limited amount of time, so why not make their time here a happy one, right? And while I admit that some of my kids took advantage of me, most of them knew when to stop asking for things.

The next day, Skye and I headed first to the pet store to pick up the kitten. He was whitish and brown... and teeny. I was actually pretty worried that I was going to squish him if I wasn't careful. 

Sirius decided to name him Mango, which I approved of. Mango also had one green eye and one orange eye, which I loved, for the record.

As for the horse, he was a Thoroughbred foal, who we named Banner. Although Skye calls him Bruce all the time, because, well, that's just Skye for you.

"You know, if we're converting your house to a zoo, you should buy a bird and some sort of rodent," she pointed out as we walked back through the door of my house.

"Shut up before one of the kids hears you," I muttered, squeezing onto her hand as Sirius came running through, chasing Mango down the hallway.

"Mom?" Cho squeaked, peeking around the archway. She looked terrified as tears streamed down her face.

"Oh no. What's wrong honey?" I inquired, speed walking over to her and wrapping my arms around her.

"Can I talk to you in private?" I nodded and we walked to my room, Cho sitting on my bed and me standing above her, looking at her anxiously.

She put her hands in her lap and looked down at them, clearly ashamed. "You have every right to kick me out of the house and call me trash, Mom, but you have no idea how sorry I am that I've done this. I look at Ginny, and she's just so perfect, with her stupid friends and boyfriend. I just couldn't handle it anymore, and I never felt like I could talk to you because you're honestly so intimidating and none of my other siblings have ever disappointed you or done anything this wrong. 

"You've never had to deal with crap like this, and I'm just--" She let out a choked sob. "I'm so sorry Mommy!" Cho started to bawl, burying her face in her hands.

"Sweet heart, what did you do?" I tried to make myself sound as sweet as possible, but by this point I was scared to death as my voice shook.

"I'm pregnant," she whispered.

My yellow eyes widened and I took a step back. Thoughts raced through my mind and I felt the mixed desire to punch her in the face and hug her and tell her everything was going to be okay.

But was it? I had never had to handle anything like this. I mean, I wasn't even mad. Was I supposed to be? It's not like I was the best example. Giving birth to random men's children was what I did for a living.

But she was just a kid! My baby shouldn't have been having a baby! But why wasn't I furious? I knew that some parents went so far as to kick their kid's out of the house when they screwed up this bad! And then I stopped myself by realizing that there was a baby in there, and it was a life, a human being, and there's no possible way that could ever be a mistake.

I sighed and sat down on the mattress next to Cho, pulling her into a tight hug, resting my chin on her shoulder. "It's okay, darling," I assured her into her pointy ear. "I'm not angry."

"Y-you aren't?"

I shook my head and leaned out, looking at her face and wiping her falling tears away with my thumb. "There's nothing you or any of your siblings could do to make me furious. You did something you shouldn't have been doing at your age, and I'm not going to lie, I am a little disappointed, but I could never be angry at the result of your mistake.

"I know you're terrified, so there would be no reason to yell. I will help you raise your baby, if that's what you want. I'll take care of him or her while you're at school, and maybe Skye could lend me a hand with your college and things like that."

Cho was wide eyed, and I could tell she was in between sobbing some more and smiling at my reassurance. "I'm just so sorry," she finally said, leaning her head on my shoulder.

"Can I just ask why you did it?"

She nodded. "I've always looked up to you too much to try and tell you what was on my mind. You just naturally expect so much from us kids, and most of us live up to your expectations. But then there's me: I'm not pretty, or particularly smart, and I have no special talents like everybody else. I pulled away from you until there was nothing to grab back onto. I could tell you gave up, and it was all my fault. I never made any effort, and you were just trying to give me my space.

"I was so far gone that I just kept doing worse and worse things, until I accepted that jerk's offer to go to his apartment. I never thought it would result in this, and I--" Her voice was trembling as she tried to hold back tears. Leaning her head back and sighing, she said, "But you're right. The result of my mistake is something I could never be ashamed of."

She smiled wetly at me and nodded. "Thank you, Mom."

"Do you think you could come to me from now on with your problems?"

"Definitely. I don't want to give this kid a sibling until I'm a lot older."

I chuckled, gave her a hug and ushered her out the door. Ginny was sitting outside it, staring wide eyed at us.

"Shi--" Cho started, but I flicked her shoulder.

"Language, Cho Parker." You know, I don't really mind swearing, but I'm already an odd enough mother, I guess I felt like I needed to discipline my kids for something. Although at this point I think I might've been a wee bit too late.

Ginny stood up as Cho ran to their room and gaped at me. "Oh, so Cho can just get pregnant and you're cool but when I'm ten minutes past my curfew all hell breaks loose?" she demanded, giving me a stone hard glare. "You need to sort out your priorities, you know."

I cocked an eyebrow. "You have no right to talk to me like this, Ginny."

She groaned. "This is not fair in any way shape or form, damn it! You're always yelling at me for the stupidest things, but when your other, perfect daughter goes and gets herself knocked up you give her a friggin' cookie!" She jabbed her finger at me, a vein bulging on her forehead. "We're all a part of your dumb challenge. Do you actually give a shit about any of us, huh, Mom?"

My mouth dropped at her. What had I done wrong? None of my kids had ever yelled at me like this before, and I was on the verge of crying myself. "Hey," Skye said, anger rising in her voice, walking to us from the kitchen. "How dare you yell at your mother!"

"Skye, please--"

"She brought you into this world and she can just as easily take you out--"

"--whoa, Skye, stop--"

"She puts a roof over your head, food in your stomach and sends you to school, and you still talk to her like she doesn't know what she's doing or doesn't give two craps about you. Well I hate to burst your bubble, kid, but you're your mother's life, and if you don't like the way she runs things, you can just get the hell out, because this is ridiculous!"

Ginny was fuming as I looked from my girlfriend to my daughter, both seemingly ready to claw each other's eyes out. "Fine, then that's what I'll do." She turned on her heel and ran out the door.

Skye looked to me, obviously worried I was going to snap. Honestly, I was about to, but I kept my mouth shut and just let it be. Ginny would be back, I was sure. It's not like she had anywhere to go, and I knew that Skye was just protective of me.

As we sat down for dinner that night, Skye said, "I'm so sorry, Paisley. I didn't think she'd actually leave."

I raised my hand to silence her. "It's alright, it really is. If she was honestly that angry, it would've happened at some point anyway."

She nodded her understanding and forked some pie into her mouth.

 Sirius ate in silence, but apparently Minerva was too curious to resist asking, "Hey Cho?"

"Yep?"

"So you're going to be a mommy?"

Cho choked on her pie and looked to me for help. I smiled and turned to Minerva. "Yes sweetie, she is. Not yet, but soon."

I hoped she'd leave it at that, but apparently that was too much to ask for. "But isn't sixteen too young? Didn't I learn that in school?"

I had no idea how to answer this. "Well, yes, but Cho didn't... know that, so now she's going to be, 

and that's alright."

"And what if I wanted to be a mommy sooner, too?"

"Erm..." I looked up to the ceiling, thinking about this. "Well... You should just wait until you're an adult." She shrugged and went back to eating.

What in the hell was happening? Was this Give Paisley a Heart Attack Day? If so, my kids were doing a pretty damn good job.

After dinner, the doorbell rang, so Skye put the drying towel down and went to answer it. "Hey Pais, it's some purple elf dude to see you!"

I nearly dropped my plate as I immediately knew who she was talking about. I sprinted over to the door and shoved Skye in the direction of the kitchen so I could speak to him privately. "Elrond? What are you doing here?"

"I'm here with the antidote," was his simple, monotone reply.

"What antidote?"

"The one to make you human again, of course."

"Naturally," I replied, not even trying to keep the snarkiness out of my tone. "But I haven't even had that many elf children yet, and wasn't the whole point of this to 'populate the world with elves?'"

He nodded. "Yes, but... That's enough. We have more challenge mothers willing to comply."

"But why can't you just let me keep going? What do you have to lose?"

"Listen Paisley, just drink this, please. Do it, okay?"

"Well, will it hurt the baby?" I inquired.

I had gone to the sperm bank earlier that day before picking up the animals, and I knew I was already pregnant. The father was a purple guy whose name was Lincoln Lavender.

"Probably, so you can wait until you have it to drink it. But I will be back then and I will force it down your throat if I have to. Understand?"

"Um... yeah?" He turned on his foot and walked out the door. "Well okay, it appears you're in a hurry, so there's no need to stick around and chat or anything!" I screamed after him.

Two days later, Ginny came storming through the door and wasn't at all happy to see Cho's baby 

bump about ready to pop. She didn't say a word to any of us, but clearly decided to stay, even though talking was no longer an option.

Cho's water broke soon after, so I rushed her to the hospital and asked Skye to come back over to watch the kids, which she did happily.

After a few miraculously short hours, I was presented with my first grandchild, Remus Parker!

Then only minutes after that, I went into labor myself and gave birth to baby 68, James Parker! 

The second Cho and I got home, Elrond was at the door. "So, I don't understand," I said after putting the babies in their cribs. "Why do you want me human again so badly?

Elrond sighed and ran a hand through his thick, purple hair. "If you stay an elf for much longer, it will be permanent and you'll lose all memory of every being a human."

I gasped slightly, not expecting that answer. "Okay, fine, give it to me. But will it hurt?"

He nodded. "It'll be excruciatingly painful, I hate to admit. Worse than when you turned the first time. Go to your room and wait it out. It should take about a full day to complete." With that, he turned around and left my house, leaving me to chug the antidote in his wake.

The next twenty four hours were the most painful of my life. I can't even find words to describe what I went through, so let's just say that after all that crap, I was a human again. 

Okay, so if you read my rainbowcy, you know who the sperm donor is, right? ^_^ I just thought it would be fun to see what Lincoln and Paisley's kid would look like. I hope this doesn't count as cheating. Oh, and I'm going to be annoying and advertise it now! You can read my rainbowcy here! It would be awesome if you did! 

Surprise, it's a Baby!- Babies 65, 66 and 67

Harry and Hermione are the first to step up to the birthday cakes. Harry ages up to be very handsome--like all of my sons--but he's very lazy. And I mean extremely. He doesn't comb his hair in the morning, doesn't put his dishes away, and pulls on dirty sweat pants and a t-shirt for school. Not that I care what he wears, but come on, at least pull something out of the clean clothes, man, really. Hermione chops off all her hair, and turns out to be the complete opposite of her child self-- she wears massive amounts of makeup and doesn't own anything that isn't ripped. And again, I don't really care what she wears, I suppose, but her behavior... The way she treats me and everyone else is horrible,  and she's failing school (because she skips most of the time). I just don't know what I'm going to do with these two.

Ginny and Cho are up next. They're both little cuties, same as they always were! Both of them style their hair the way they have since they were toddlers, concerned that any other style would make their ears extra pointy looking. In my opinion, their ears are quite adorable! They shouldn't be trying to cover them up, but they won't listen to their old mom. Ginny is still pretty attached to me, and she tells me that I'm her best friend, which I'm all for, but I do wish she'd go out and socialize with friends her own age. Cho still prefers to be as far away from me as possible, and while I wish she'd like me more, I can't force her to, so I leave her be.

Sirius and Minerva wiggle their way out of their blankets and into toddler-hood! Minerva ends up with mysterious blonde hair, that I style into pigtails every day. While neither of them got Elrond's striking red eyes, I can't help but want to snuggle them to death! They're just so damn cute! Sirius also gets strange brown hair, but is just as adorable as his twin sister. I'm not really sure where they got their hair colors, but oh well, doesn't make them any less precious!

I lined them up and took a picture of my kids, all one stage older. Fortunately for my hormones, nobody moved out just yet, since there are no young adults in the house.

After I was finished fawning over my grown children, my phone started to vibrate in my pocket, making my leg tremble. Fishing it out, I put it to my ear and squealed, "EVERARD!"

Skye chuckled. "Hey Parker."

Grinning from ear to ear, I said, "What're you calling me for? You don't usually call me till later in the day. I mean, I'm glad to talk to you, but it's just strange. It's still light out."

"Well, I was wondering if I could come visit you for a while. I miss you."

"Um... Okay. Yeah!"

The door burst open and Skye waltzed in. "Good, I'm glad you said yes because that would've been a waste of a plane ride." Ecstatic, I sprinted over to her and leapt into her arms. "Hiya." She squeezed me tight and then set me down on the ground.

My teal haired girlfriend looked around the house, frowning.

"What is it?" I inquired, concerned, grabbing onto her hand.

"Your house is very lacking of the Christmas spirit."

"Yeah, but it's November--"

She raised her hand to silence me. "Doesn't matter. Where're your decorations?"

I raised my orange eyebrows. "In the basement in boxes?"

Skye nodded. "Off we go!" She grabbed onto my wrist and ran down the stairs, nearly dragging me behind her.

Within the hour we had the Christmas tree up in the living room, stockings above the fire place, garland strung around the house and a wreath next to the door.

"So, what's this sudden desire to improve my home?" I asked as Skye sat down on a couch in the front room, pulling me onto her lap and wrapping her arms around my waist.

She shrugged, leaning in to plant her lips on mine. "I just missed you, is all, and I thought your house could use a spruce-up."

I grinned as her kiss turned into a full on make-out session for the next few minutes. When my jaw got tired, I offered, "How about we watch the Avengers? I know how much you love it."

Skye smirked. "You know me too well."

We popped in the movie and snuggled with each other for the duration of it, my head in her lap a good chunk of the time. I eventually fell asleep and when the movie ended, Skye scooped me into her arms and walked me to my bed.

"Nighty-night, Parker," she whispered into my ear before kissing my forehead and slipping under 

the covers with me.

We decided to refrain from doing anything more than sleeping until we were married. It was still a new thing for me to be with a woman, and Skye decided it would be more special if we built up the desire to do so. So we waited.

In the morning, Skye kissed me awake, smiling. "Hey," she breathed. "I have a surprise for you."

"What is it?" I asked sleepily, reaching up to wipe the sleep from my eyes.

"You'll have to come with me and see for yourself, lazy butt." I nodded and slid off of my 

mattress, falling limply onto the floor.

"No me gusta."

She laughed, leaping over the edge of the bed to pull me to my feet. Shaking, I wobbled into the bathroom to get ready for the day.

When I finished, Skye led me to the car and we began our drive. "Can't you just tell me where we're going?" I begged, changing the song to The Sun Ain't Gonna Shine Any More, her favorite song.

She shook her head, grinning. "Absolutely not. That'd ruin the surprise."

"The suspense is killing me."

"Hush."

I shut my mouth and waited the drive out, looking over at my best friend every once in a while, hoping she'd break.

She didn't.

Soon, she slowed the car down and parked on the side of the road. "Welcome to hell!" She did an 

amazing evil laugh and then said, "But seriously, this is your surprise."

We were in front of a pet store.

I looked over at her, widening my eyes. "What is this?"

"I'mma buy you a dog. I know you used to have one, and then it ran away, right?" I nodded my confirmation. "And you were talking about it the other day and you seemed so sad, and I hate it when you're sad, so... yeah."

I offered her a half smile, touched. "That's so sweet. Thanks."

She opened the door and hopped out of the car, walking into the pet store. I quickly followed suit, looking around in awe at all of the animals. There were cages housing bright colored birds all over, and tanks with various rodents, lizards and snakes lining the walls.

"Wow," I mouthed to Skye across the room. She nodded and pointed to the back room. I followed her there and my mouth dropped when I saw the walls lined with cages, their occupants furry dogs, big and small.

"C'mere," she said, beckoning me over to a Border Collie-ish dog. "His dad is a Husky and his mother is a Border Collie. I already bought him so you better love him."

I nodded. He was so teeny and had orange eyes! "I love him." She smiled and we walked out with the puppy and headed back to my house.

*******************************************************************************

On the way back home, we stopped by the sperm bank and picked up the next father's contribution: Johnny Moustache.

An interesting find on Skye's part. She had already given me so much and she had barely been there for twenty four hours.

Skye decided that she wanted to stay for the rest of my pregnancy to "make sure I didn't kill ze baby." Well excuse me, ma'am, I've done this before, thank you.

When I finished at the bank, we headed home, allowing the kids to play with the dog, who we named Beans (courtesy of Cho).

"Whadda ya want for dinner?" I asked the four older kids, who were seated in the living room, playing video games.

"Pasketti," Ginny squeaked.

"It's 'spaghetti,' Gin," Harry corrected. "And I'd like that too."

Hermione and Cho nodded their agreement, so I set to work on their food. Skye walked in halfway through the process and wrapped her arms around my waist, resting her head on my shoulder. 

"Hiya," she whispered seductively into my elf ear. "The way you make pasketti is hawt."  

I chuckled. "You should see the way I make alfredo."

When I finished, Skye called throughout the house, "Kids! Dinner's ready!" They came sprinting into the dining room and sat down, forks in hand.

"Fooooood," Harry said excitedly, pounding his fists on the table.

I sat at the head while Skye sat right next to me. When we finished eating, I went about cleaning up 

the house and Teal Head decided to help out.

When we completed that, Skye and I chased Beans around the house and played tug of war for a while, then allowed him to play with his toys alone in my bedroom. The great thing about my home was that it was only one story, so Beans could get from room to room without having to worry about any stairs.

"So, you happy with the dog?" Skye asked. I was sitting on the porch railing as she pulled herself up to join me, looking up at the stars.

I nodded. "Definitely. Thanks, by the way. How much do I owe you?"

She turned her head to look at me, cocking an eyebrow. "For what?"

"Beans."

She shook her head violently. "Absolutely not. That was a gift for my girlfriend."

I smiled slightly. "I can't believe I only realized that I loved you a few months ago."

Skye shrugged, smirking. "Worry not, you have me now."

By the next day, my stomach had grown slightly, causing me to become excited to see my baby. I had raised sixty four babies, and I never got tired of giving them life. Yeah, sometimes I needed a break, but at the end of the day, I loved each of them and was prepared for any of their shenanigans.

Each child offered me a new experience, so almost nothing surprised me. I had raised a ghost, multiple vampires and was in the process of bringing up elves. I had dealt with a few rebellious and nerdy teens, and honestly I just wasn't expecting anything too tough to tackle.

Skye decided that she wanted to bring the memory of visiting her "lovah" back home to Cherwood, so she asked me to have a photo shoot with her. Since my tummy was barely visible, I complied.

We hired a photographer, and since we were apparently "famous challenge mothers," he did it for us for free, which was a plus.

(ignore the fact that in some pictures they're in different clothes and have different hair. I didn't originally take these pictures for the post, just for fun, then decided I might as well put them to use)

We did it in my backyard, and the photographer said to just... kiss. So that's what we did, and I must say, they came out looking amazing.

Two days after that, I gave birth to babies 65 and 66, Ron and Fleur Parker!

When I was putting the babies in their cribs, the door bell rang, so I quickly opened the door and was shocked to see another little baby on my porch.

"SKYE!" I yelled, starting to panic. She came sprinting to me, panting.

"What's wrong? Are you okay?"

I pointed at the baby in the blanket. Skye raised an eyebrow.

"Huh... Hey look, there's a note."

I bent down and picked off the piece of paper attached to the blanket and examined it: To Ms. Paisley Parker. I cannot take care of my baby, but I knew that you could. I sincerely hope that you will take him into your home and raise him as your own. I haven't named him yet, I thought that I would let you do that. Take good care of him, please.

And that was it.

I picked up the little boy, who was bright blue with dark blue hair and white eyes and brought him inside. Of course I was going to raise him! I wasn't going to dump him off to someone who had no idea what they were doing when it came to kids. I named him Albus and then quickly aged up Ron and Fleur so I didn't have more babies than I could handle.

I suppose I got one more baby than I had expected, but that was completely all right with me.